Sunday was the day. Our church, after months and months of prayer, opened it up to the members of the congregation and they came forward with their commitment cards, pledging what they would give over the next 3 years of the project. This has been emotional for me. I have been encouraged to visualize my children coming to know the Lord in the worship center, growing their faith in the new education building and hopefully getting married in our revived sanctuary (which has been there since 1920, I think). This new campus isn't just for me, but it's for them...and that's been the greatest part for me personally. I know that it's for a bigger purpose of God's glory, but I can't wait to see that manifested in the lives of my children. In thinking all of that it causes me to wonder how this will look for Ella in the years to come. I allow my minds eye to go down the road of "how old will she be when it's all complete?" (she'll be 7...I can't imagine her being 7!), "will she be able to enjoy all of the new amenities?" (yep, they are keeping special needs children in mind when they design the new Education building), "will she learn about Jesus and salvation and His true love for her?" (yes, that is our church's ultimate focus for not only Ella, but all of our kids). I'm excited to get to watch all of the kids enjoy the new facilities, but more to watch them grow IN knowledge in the new buildings.
When I sat in the service yesterday I was excited to just watch the last year of planning and excitement come together. I didn't realize that I would find myself crying, and almost uncontrollably. Sandi Patty came to our church yesterday to sing with the choir and orchestra. I've always thought she was great, and even remember her being one of my very first cassette tapes when I was younger, but I didn't realize that her performance yesterday would break me. As much as I love her voice, it was the woman standing next to her that I couldn't take my eyes off of...her name is Lisa Smith. Lisa has Down Syndrome and while Sandi sang she did the AMAZING sign language for the song. Lisa sang with her whole body. She loved the Lord without opening her mouth and with a body that the world says is handicapped...and she did it BEAUTIFULLY. All I could picture while Lisa praised the Lord was Ella...and what her form of worship would look like. I want her to stand to her feet or fall to her face in praise for who the Lord is and what He has done for her. It still makes me wonder if Ella will ever have the cognitive ability to accept the grace of God and choose wholeheartedly to follow Him.
Then today, as if God knew what I was wondering (and of course He did), I found this blog post, which lead me to read this post and I'm reminded that God's plans for Ella's life have not been, and will probably never be, fully revealed to me. However, I am content to know that He is in control of both her life and her eternal life, as long as I do as He tells me to do as her mother. So, I'll end with a verse that they included in their posts:
"Remember dear brothers and sisters, that few of you were wise in the world's eyes or powerful and wealthy when God called you. Instead, God chose things the world considers foolish in order to shame those who think they are wise. And He chose things that are powerless to shame those who are powerful. God chose things despised by the world, things counted as nothing at all, and used them to bring to nothing what the world considers important. As a result, no one can ever boast in the presence of God." 1 Corinthians 1:26-29 (New Liv
ing Translation)
ing Translation)